I Am She: 2013

Monday 23 December 2013 0 comments

A Request

Sardi se jism ka har hissa sunn ho gaya hai

Buss tumharay khayal baaqi hain

Tum aa jatay tu shayad yeh bach jatay

Chandni Raat

Tum chamakte chand ho

Main andhairi raat hoon

Dono gar sath hon tu phir chandni raat ho

Laal Rang

Muhabbat khushboo jaisi hai

Main gulaab jaisi hoon

Aur tum gulaab pe laal rang jaise ho

Dhoop

Dhoop dil ko bha rahi hai

Lekin

Dhoop mein mojood

Ye surkh rang

Is baat ki gawahi hai

Kay phir
Raat honay wali hai

Dilaasaa

Zindagi,

Ek aam si bemari hai..

Aaj hai,

Kal nahin hogi..

Kamra No. 39

Kitabain bhi

Kapray bhi

Bistar bhi

Jootay bhi

Notes bhi

Aur bhi boht kuch hai..

Kamra No. 39 mein,

Kuch bhi simta howa nahin..

Har shay bikhri parhi hai,

Haan..

Main bhi...

Ehsaas

Darwazay pe dastak tu hoyi hi nahin

Phir bhi lagta hai jaise koyi aaya hai

Tumhara na hona bhi 'honay' jaisa lagta hai...

I am "she" and I want to write about "he". Yes, seriously, about men. I am not going to say words of praise about them and I am not going to disgrace them either. I just want to write about them, at this very moment, atleast. Because "I Am She" is not a feminist's diary, it is a humanist's. Yes, I am she and I am a humanist.

We see, on surface, men are cruel, selfish, stingy, stone hearted, egotistical, self centered, mean, hoggish, prejudiced, ferocious, wicked, merciless, ruthless, flirts, wolves, dogs and ah, what yes and what not.

Poor men, serioulsy, so poor!

Maybe, it is how they have chosen to be projected to the world of women. Or maybe, we women lack those eyes to see them and their place and their life. I am not being pro men or anti women. Well, I don't know what am I being like?

I have friends from both the worlds, that is, men and women. And if I speak the truth, we women are so judgemental, so so full of doubts, so critical, so insecure, so fault finding, so over thinking, so over reacting, so confused and so confusing, so so so cutting and again, what yes and what not. We women find this life difficult, challanging, unstable, awkward, punishing, burdensome and the list goes on and on.

But the question is, ain't life alike for them too? Ain't it worse for them too out there?

Life is just one and once for us and for them, too. It is just that we treat life differently and they treat life differently, too. Because we are different both biologically and psychologically. We women have many challanges in life but by God, men have challanges in life too. Since childhood, they are given a lesson that they have to support their parents, they have to protect their sisters, they have to run and finance a family, no matter what, it is what they have to do whatever may come and go, they can't just be blind to their duties and responsibities. Going freely anywhere and everywhere at any moment does not mean they don't have any chains. They too have chains, maybe different from that of women but they do also have them. Its not that they are all in all free. The way we women need love, respect and appreciation in life, so do men, seriously.

Yes, it is a truth that there is a black evil side of men too but we can't label their whole being like that. At a certain point of life, we are good and yet at another certain point of life, we act evil. But that is not just with men. Women have this face too. We women have an evil inside us too. We too act bad in some situations of life. Then, we are standing on the same road. Right?

I want to admit one more thing and that is, the biggest enemy of women is not men but women. Yes, Women are womens' biggest enemies. And you all know the answer to it's how and why. Women harm women more than men do. Maybe, we don't realize it, or maybe, we are blind to see it.

We women can cry our hearts out whenever its suffocating inside. What about men? They don't, they can't. How bad. Society questions them if they ever are seen crying. It says, you are a man, you can't cry, you just can't cry. Ain't it a big, scary injustice to them?? What do you say??

I have seen men thinking for their mothers, sisters, wives, daughters, a hundred times more than themselves. They worry more for their women. They love them more. Infact, whatever they do is for their women, almost. Men also have a heart that sees and that feels. They also are fighting certaing wars in their lives. The also cry if not openly, maybe when lonely. It is just that they are weak at expressing. It is just that they get projected like that. It is just the way they are.

I may not have been successful in conveying my message out there but let's let them the way they are. Men have a good side too which is friendly, which is kind, which is helpful, which is cooperating, Let's start seeing the good side. Let's stop seeing them with our two naked eyes, let's start seeing this creature of God with the third unseen eye. We women are humans, and so are men. And humans can never be angels. They would sometimes be good and yet at other times, they would be evil. But whatever, let's not talk about bad points of eachother. Let's not laugh at eachother. Let's not abuse eachother. Let's make this world a better place to live.

Intezar

Aik Baat Btayen Tum Ko??

Mausamon mein

Sab Se Ziada

Ham Sardiyon Ka

Intezar Kartay Hain

Aur Us Se Bhi Ziada...?

"Tumhara".....

Zinda Rehne K Liye

Zinda rehne k liye,

Saans laina,

Zaroori hai;

Zinda rehne k liye,

Dil ka dharakna bhi,

Zaroori hai;

Zinda rehne k liye,

Hasna rona bhi,

Zaroori hai;

Zinda rehne k liye,

Zinda rehna bhi,

Zaroori hai;

Zinda rehne k liye,

Shayad....

Sab kuch hi,

Zaroori hai;

Lekin;

Tumhara hona,

Zaroori nahin,

Tumhara hona,

"BOHOT"

Zaroori hai....

Markaz

Meri zaat ki shakl kuch bhi ho,

Mustateel ho,

Murabba ho,

Daayera ho,

Tikoon ho,

Lakeer ho,

Meri zaat ki shakl kuch bhi ho,

Markaz sirf aik hai,

Aur woh tum ho....

Sardi

Sard sard raaton mein, main be fikr soti,
Teray bazoo'on ki garm shawl gar hoti..

Baarish kab hogi ???

"Baarish kab hogi ?

Jab baad'lon mein pani hoga..

Qatra brabar ho, Ya darya brabar ho..

Samajh gaye na?

Baad'lon mein pani nahi hoga,

Tu baarish nahin hogi...."

The Light Within

My mother often tells me, I was born in the month of Ramadan. Among Muslims, this is the most beautiful month of all. Today was the 1st of Ramadan. And today, when I woke up, it was 1am. Only I was awake. My mother, brother and sister were all asleep. I could hear a voice coming from a nearby mosque. Somebody was reciting the verses from the Holy Quran. Mujhe acha lag raha tha. I mean, I'm not much inclined to my religion but still it was way soothing and peaceful than any other thing I have had seen. I got up to make preparations for sehri when it was about to struck 2. On reaching kitchen, the lights turned down. In my area, turning down of lights never follows any schedule. And UPS was down too. Well, I started searching for the match box. I found out it after an effort of 10 minutes and on litting it up, I thought, Roshni tu andar thi..

RAMADAN KAREEM TO ALL

Do Raastay

Mere pass do raastay hain

Dono he dil se jurrhay hain

Aur dono mere nahin hain..

Prayer

They say,

You never leave..

O God,

Please never leave..

Raat

Raat jab bhi aati hai,

Ikk azaab laati hai,

Lekin tum yeh kab samajhtay ho..

Thinking

My softmints,

Are not soft,

Anymore.

I stand thinking,

Here,

At the door.

Zindagi

Kabhi yeh udhti phirti hai,

kabhi kisi phool pe thehrti hai,

Haan, zindagi tu titli hai….

Koi Baat Nahin

Aaj bhi hawaa chali,

Aaj bhi duaein keen,

Tum magar nahi aaye!

A Flower

A flower when full,
Gives a lovely view,
Without light and food,
A flower leaves all hue,
And it also is a picture,
Of me, without you....
An old news it sure is,
I know it looks not new.

For Nothing

And so,
even now,
after when this mind has turned into a barren land of bewilderment
and after when this heart has become a silent desert of dried wishes,
I keep some flowers inside though withered,
they still have color, they still are perfumy.

Will you marry me???

My each feeling turned red,

When he asked me,

"Will you marry me???"

Gosh! I was so happy..

And do you know,

What happened next?

I woke up....

Tumhari Yaad

Sardiyon mein sambhalay rakhti hai,
Garmiyon mein bachaye rakhti hai,

Tumhari yaad kitni achi hai..........

Heart Transplant

Would have gone

For an urgent heart transplant,

Indeed,

If,

A changed heart beating pattern

Was gauranteed..

And,

Since they don't gaurantee,

I don't agree...

Hawa

Hawa chal rahi hai..
Aap bhi chalain na..
Please,
Mere saath....

Longing

Kabhi kabhi milo mujhe,

Abhi nahin.. tu kal sahi,

Ziddi kaho, kuch bhi kaho,

Ya main koyi pagal sahi,

Kabhi kabhi milo mujhe,

Meri zaat abb meri nahin,

adhoori sahi, mukamal sahi,

Tou nahi hai tu koyi na ho,

Andhaira ho aur jangal sahi.

My Sun

While coming back to my hostel today,

I thought,

If not in rain,
I should, at least take an umbrella with me,
in this scorching heat of the boiling sun.

But then,

I thought,

Why the hell would I ignore my sun?

Baarishain

Kaanon mein saaz bajtay hain,

Aankhon mein rang khiltay hain,

Dil ki dharkan taiz hoti hai,

Paon apne raqs kartay hain,

Baarishain jabb bhi hoti hain,

Kamal karti hain, kamal hoti hain..

Farz Karo

Farz karo,
Aaj ka din muhabbat ka aalmi din hai,
Aur farz karo,
Tumhain iqrar karna hai,
Tu farz karo,
Jhoot hi sahi,
Kya tum iqrar karo gay?
Ya pathar banay raho gay?

I Sigh

Under the starry sky, stood you and I,

With night so dark, I seemed so shy!

Close you were with me that moment,

But................. went in vain all my try!

Weakened was I, in the gaze of thy eye,

Bloody my heart that could not fly!

Audible it was, did you hear the cry?

I sigh, I sigh, I sigh, I sigh, I sigh.....

Jee Chahay Panchhi ho javan

Ab Aur Kya Chahtay Ho?

Ab aur kya chahtay ho?
Tmhari hi yeh enayatain hain,
Kuch is tarha se nawaza hai k,
Meri laadli si zindagi ko qatl kar k,
Umar boht hi daraaz kar di,
Shirin keh k, meethay ban k,
Zeher pila k chalay gaye ho,
Aag jaisi barf kaise,
mere seenay k paar kar di,
Daad daini paray gi tum ko,
Suboot chhoda na laash chhodi..

Ab aur kya chahtay ho?

O Grany

I know,

You sleep in the grave,

Would you,

Even then,

Listen to me, O Grany?

Look,

My pieces are scattered,

And are many,

More than many,

But,

You would be happy,

O Grany, To know,

Though pieces are many,

Every piece is complete,

In it's price of a penny.

And now, O Grany,

Would you speak,

If I ask for an advice,

If you have any??

I'm Blue

Despite all the beauty,
Despite all the charm around,
Why, even then,
This white ashen heart is bound ?
And then among all,
Heartache is the worst, horribly worst.
I have heard,
When you give your heart the highest roar,
It hurts no more, it hurts no more.
But what if one considers pain,
The only gain,
The dearest gain ?
It is okay for it is true.
Yes, I'm blue.

Dil ka mausam

Tujh ko parh k aik kahani aankhon mei tarr aati hai,
Meri kitabon k lafzon mei teri surat nazar aati hai...

Bdal gaya hai mausam bhi, dil ka mausam waisa hai,
Tujh ko aksar soch k dharkan dil se he ladh jati hai..

Kuch tu thoda waqt kathin hai, kch kch tou bhi pathhar jaisa,
Kon si sada hai wo jo tujh ko mere ghar laati hai......

Ban'na sanwarna tu mujh ko na aata tha na aata hai,
Tujh bin yunhi sheesha daikh aankh meri bhar aati hai..

Kaise pagal ladkay ho, khud ko bhool jane ka kehte ho,
Dharkan aisa sochay tu khudsar aur bas mar mar jati hai..

Mera bdalna na jaa'iz hai tujh se rishta hai kuch aisa,
Tujh ko pta hai teri wajah se saans andar aati hai..

Baqi sb kuch chhod k jana bus itna he batla do,
Be manzil si ik sarak pe kaya tujhe Shirin nazar aati hai ?

hadd e pyar se

Ye chehray tere nahi hain lekin phir bhi
Nazar aata hai inn mein chehra tera...

Meri nabz k chalnay mei tera hath boht hai
Mere khoon se rishta hai boht gehra tera..

Tere khayalon se kabhi nahi milti fursat mujh ko
Yun howa karta hai meri sochon pe pehra tera..

Khud hi khud se ladnay pe main datti rehti hun
Tujh se kaya kahun mujh se boht door rehna tera..

Tere baad mere haathon mei bacha kuch bhi nahi
Na wo kangan hai aur na hi wo lams thehra tera..

Ab bhi ussi ek naam k talism mei gum hun Jana !
Wo mujh ko hadd e pyar se Shirin kehna tera..

Aap ka hona

" Kabhi kabhi
jab saans nahi aa rahi hoti
Tu
Aap ka hona
Oxygen k jaisa lagta hai
Kitab mei lafzon k jaisa
Aur
Andhairay mei
rangon k jaisa lagta hai "

" Kabhi kabhi
Jab neend nahi aa rahi hoti
Tu
Aap ka hona
Lauri k jaisa lagta hai
Dhoop mei saaye
Aur
Shaam ki chaaye k
jaisa lagta hai "

" Kabhi kabhi
Jab dil udas hota hai
Tu
Aap ka hona
Sookhay patton pe chalnay k
jaisa lagta hai
Khamoshi mei awaaz
Aur
Geet mei saaz k
jaisa lagta hai "

" Kabhi kabhi
Jab koi bhi sath na ho
Tu
Aap ka hona
Saans k jaisa lagta hai
Hathon mei kisi k hath k jaisa
Aur
Tanhai mei kisi k sath k jaisa
lagta hai "

" Kabhi kabhi
Jab umeedain khonay lagain
Tu
Aap ka hona
Murgh ki azaan k jaisa lagta hai
Khuda pe eemaan
Aur
Jaan mei jaan k jaisa lagta hai "

" Kabhi kabhi
Jab main ro parhti hun
Tu
Aap ka hona
Kisi pe maan k jaisa lagta hai
Madham se ik gaanay jaisa
Aur
Khud ko khud mei paanay
jaisa lagta hai "

" Kabhi kabhi
Jab ghussa aaye
Tu
Aap ka hona
Aur
Khamoshi se mujhko suntay rehna
Lab ko lab se chhoonay jaisa lagta hai
Taiz dharkan pe kisi k hath k jaisa
Aur
Kaan mei pyar ki baat k jaisa lagta hai "

" Kabhi kabhi
Jab sar dukhta ho
Tu
Aap ka hona
Sar ki maalish k jaisa lagta hai
Maa k bejaa laad k jaisa
Aur
Sar pe baap k hath k jaisa lagta hai "

" Kbhi kabhi
Jab darr jauun
Tu
Aap ka hona
Aaghosh k jaisa lagta hai
Barson pehle maangi mannat
Aur
Zameen pe jannat k jaisa lagta hai "

" Kabhi kabhi
Jab thhak jauun
Tu
Aap ka hona
Ik naaye aaghaz k jaisa lagta hai
Baadal aur barsaat k jaisa
Aur
Phoolon ki soghaat k jaisa lagta hai "

" Aap tu aksar chup rehte hain
Par
Kabhi kabhi
Jab main chup hoon
Tu
Aap ka mujh se batain karna
Khud se pyar k jaisa lagta hai
Khamoshi mei baaton k jaisa
Aur
Baanhon mei baanhon k jaisa lagta hai "

" Kabhi kabhi
Jab baithay baithay
Main kuch na manoon
Aur
Aap ka yunhi haqq jatlana
Aur kehna k
Tou sirf meri hai
Aur main Tera hoon
Tu
"Jana"
Jaantay hain k mujh ko
Kaisa lagta hai ?
Tu
Mujh ko
Pyyar se pyara lgta hai
Jaan se jana lagta hai "

Roshni

Roshni,

boht kam hai,

har taraf hain saaye mere..

Aur Main?
Aur main..

kahin nahin hun...

Life - (by me)

Yes, life is beautiful and along with that, it is cruel too.

It has its own eyes, it has its own ears and hands, and it has its own heart and mind.
It doesn't care much about what we humans feel or want it to be. It goes on its own path and it follows its own heart.
And it is not bad at all. I think, it is the beauty, it is the charm.
Why should it do what we ask it? Why can't it be the ideal of it's own?
It can, for sure and that's what it does no matter what.

We are happy when we see life going our way and we feel sad when we find it doing something that doesn't please us.
It is natural, it is normal. It is not that life sometimes pleases us and other times offends us. Its just that life is doing what it wants. It doesn't know about when we do become happy and when do we cry over little and big things.It is just moving on like water does, like wind does.

Things are simple. Let me say, life is an event and we all are invited to the event to make it memorable and play our part. On this event, some among us would love the songs, others would hate and the rest would have no concern. Again, on this event, some would like the food items and would enjoy eating, others would just wish there should have been something of their choice and there would surely be some faces who would have no such problem, they would actually be happy with everything be it good or bad, be it of their choice or not. Simple! Isn't it?

Everything looks fine at its time. I know, nobody would disagree if I say, laughing is good, being happy is good, helping in all the possible ways is good. And I hope you would also agree if I say, crying is good, anger is good.
Thank you if you agree and try to understand if you disagree.

You see, life is a blend of countless things. If I can laugh when I want to, I can cry either when I have to. Why should we always keep controlling and giving our inside a shut up call only because we are afraid of the eyes outside? It is not mandatory to give reasons to those who ask us the reason of crying. Of course, we don't have to.

Did anyone ever ask you, ''why are you not crying today''?
The answer is a big No. So why should there be questions otherwise? Right? Yeah, right.

It also doesn't mean to get harsh with the questions. We can so softly tell them, its simply because we have to cry for a while to get things balanced inside out. Tears are not bad at all. Tears are my life's symbol. They have made me whole.
I like those who can cry without showing much concern about what would others say about them and this is how things should be.

I never heard anyone saying that he is afraid of smiling or laughing but crying. Don't be if so. So what if we want to cry or sit in silence for some short time? So what if we are down? So what if things are going bad? So what man, so what??? Do not stop yourself from both the emotions be it a laugh or a cry. Both are beautiful in their own particular ways. Both are the symbols of life. Both are necessary. Had they not been here, life would have been numb. Right?

Life just wants us to be honest with it.
Honesty is the ingredient, truthfulness is the need, love is the word.

You want to laugh? Just laugh.
You have a reason to cry? Just cry.
You want to say YES? Say it.
You want to return a No? Return it.

You have to have an honest leap like a child does. Yes, never lose your childhood. Be a child at whatever age you reach and whatever maturity it demands

Whatever way you take the moment, take it fully, own it fully. Life wants us to live it to the fullest.
Doesn't it? Believe me, it does and there lies the peace, there lies the beauty.

Bolo, kya khayal hai ?

Khoobsoorat zindagee hai,
Khoobsoorat har ghadi hai,
Musarratain hain chaar soo,
Abb na koyi malaal hai..

Har subh'h hi nayi hai,
Har shaam hi jawan hai,
Aise mein tum kahan ho?
Bolo, kya khayal hai? :P

Kitna chhupo gay mujh se?
Kitna bacho gay mujh se?
Har dil ki hukmaraan hoon,
In aankhon ka sb kamal hai.. :P